Friday, December 30, 2011

This isn't easy

One of my dogs is sick, not a cold or under the weather kind of sick.
She is dying.
Most of my pets were brought into our home long before we ever thought of having children and now that we have a daughter it is very hard to explain to her why we keep loosing them.
She can't understand why my MinPin Lexie, who used to jump and play and bark wants to only stay in her cage and sleep. She can't understand why she is getting so thin.
She asked today what was wrong with her dog.
I didn't lie.
I told her the truth.
That Lexie is old and sick and will be going away soon and won't be coming back.
and then I cried
I cried because it is hard to watch your pets get sick and die
I cried because I saw the heartbreak in my daughter's eyes at the thought of her dog going away and never coming back
and I cried at the thought of loosing her Baba (great-grandma) who is not well and in a nursing home.
I cried when I heard my daughter playing, telling the other toys that one of the other toys was sick. I know that is how she is processing it all but it is hard to hear.
I cried because the other day she asked where her Baba was, when told Baba was in the hospital my daughter asked if she was sick.
I was not ready for my 2 year old to have to know death.
I know she doesn't really understand/comprehend it at the age but she will sense the losses and the emotions of those around her and that's difficult as her mom.
Thanks for listening.
Author Unknown


Kristi Bowman said...

Sniff sniff, I've been through it so many times. My heart is with you and your family.

Holly said...

Shannon, I'm sitting here crying my eyes out right now...just this morning we sent my 9 year old German Shaperd over the Rainbow Bridge. Wr found out yesterday that she had cancer, and it spread before we were aware she even had it. It's been a devestating day for us. And having children who don't quite understand, or are only just starting to understand, makes it so much harder. My thoughts are with you and your family. XOXO

(and to top it onff, we are celebrating Erin's birthday today. ::sigh::)

Therese's Treasures said...

Shannon, This is always hard no matter how old one maybe that you are having to give bad news to, but being honest about it is the best way, there will be less confusion about death the older your daughter gets.

Shirley said...

So glad you were up front with her, even at her young age. It truly is hard to lose a pet, but if someone had asked me if I would rather have not had them growing up, I would have told them they were crazy. I have lovely memories of all my animals, and now am dealing with my daughter in the other room crying because a stray landed on our front porch this morning, and he is, of course, sick and old. We are taking him to the vet to see if he has been microchipped. I don't hold out much hope, and will probably have to have him put down. And then console my daughter. But it truly is a part of life, and for me, it makes me appreciate our furry family that much more. Hugs to all of you~

Courtney said...

I am so sorry to read this. Having just lost a pet in November, I can relate to how raw it is. I am glad you were honest with your daughter. Best way to go.

Good luck,

indigo heart said...

Hey, Shannon. Doesn't this hurt? I'm so sorry for your burdens. My Grammy died when I was five, and so I grew up understanding death. I think your daughter will be okay. I'm actually more worried about you. You can't protect your daughter from pain, as much as we desperately want to. And watching them hurt is worse than anything. I believe animals have souls, so your dear little one will be in heaven waiting for you. Maybe tell your daughter she'll see her dog again? If you believe in heaven. Hugs and my prayers are with you.

Mellisa said...

Oh I'm so so sorry to hear this Shannon...not only are you having to deal with your own feelings of loss, you have your daughter's to field as well. You were so right to address it with her the way you did though...and I cried for you too...

Meagan said...

I'm so sorry Shannon! That's such a tough place to be... especially with a loved pet. Praying for you & your little one!

Erin Fickert-Rowland said...

Oh, Shannon... I am just so sick about you and Holly going through this. I still have young dogs, and I look at them and know my heart will break when we have to say goodbye. My love goes out to you and your whole family...big ((hugs)) to you! Thank you for sharing your story

Spirited Earth said...

This is so sad...sorry you are having to go thru this ..i've got aging pets and it's always difficult when that time comes, and hard to know when is the time to let them go.